Same Crap, Different Bucket
An Englishman's adventure in the land that Chocolate Digestives forgot.

Archive for the ‘Stuff and Nonsense’ Category


December 23, 2009

 Australians like beer. I know; I was shocked too.  Perhaps my surprise was borne from tasting some of the barely potable beers Australia has exported to the rest of the world. Surely a nation that produces something as abhorrent as Foster’s Twist can’t be that serious about beer? The emission outputs of the entire Western […]

Red sky in morning…end of the world?

September 23, 2009

“My flatmate burst into my room and shouted, “Wake up! Ginger people have taken over the world and painted the sky orange!””, chortled the man next to me in the bus queue. The rest of us stared blearily into the dense sandy smog to see what would emerge first, the L90 bus or the four […]

“If you’re not buying Australian, why? Why NOT?”

August 25, 2009

Wayne, the eccentric, fat-handed, real estate agent, is a whirlwind of colloquialisms and flamboyant gestures. I’m watching him with wide eyes as he swings those chunky mittens round his cramped office as if he’s directing a plane with fleshy pink paddles. I’m firmly of the opinion that if you were to take a blood sample […]

Down on the farm

August 15, 2009

One of the most surprising features of Australian society I have found is the multitude of rules designed to regulate all aspects of daily life. Don’t eat on the train. Don’t drink on the bus. Don’t be lured into eating on the train and drinking on the bus by the food and beverage vending machines […]

“I thought you said I was alright, Spider”

July 31, 2009

It’s a little known fact that there are lots of big and vicious spiders in Australia. You’d have thought someone would have mentioned it to me before I moved here, seeing as I’m an incurable arachnophobe. It’s as if people just expected me to know this piece of ‘well-known’ information. It’s come as a bit […]

The Departing

July 26, 2009

When you make the decision to emigrate to Australia, there are certain things you have to accept you are going to miss. For me, these could largely be categorised as Family, Friends and Football. In addition, you have to deal with the prospect of life without Jeff Stelling, Peep Show, banks will foolishly generous overdraft […]